Vice & Vise

With a C – a habit deemed inappropriate or immoral, often used to describe gambling, drinking, or sexual depravity (or as I like to call it: Tuesday).
With an S – a clamping tool used to hold an object still while it is worked upon.

Coop & Coupe

Coop – a small living space built for birds such as chickens or pigeons.
Coupe – a two-door car with a fixed roof.
One of my all-time favorite jokes: Why does a chicken coop have two doors? Because if it had four, it would be a chicken sedan.

Altar & Alter

With an A – (n.) a table or platform used for religious ceremonies and sacrifices.
With an E – (v.) to make something different than it was.

Frankly, though, I hope this doesn't come off like I'm advocating for either side. Maybe I should go back to Olympic themed posts. :)

One & Won

In the Olympic spirit, we present:

Go, Jamaica!

Mail & Male

I hate to make generalizations about gender, but the fact that I'm basically using restroom signage seems to justify it in this case.

Parish & Perish

With an A – (n.) a local church or church district.
With an E – (v.) to die, spoil, or otherwise become ruined.

Knot & Not

With a K – the hard mass of wood where a branch met the trunk of a tree. Or, the hard mass where a piece or pieces of cord are intertwined. Or, a measure of nautical speed equal to one mile per hour.
Without a K – an adverb used to negate the phrase that it modifies.

U

Hey, you! Let's do another letter homophone, why not? Why not, indeed... 

Today we tackle one of the very few 4-panel groups (so far, only carrot, pear, and tease) on our list.

Hey, U, underrated vowel!
Hey, ewe, female sheep!
Hey, yew, evergreen shrub!
Yeah, I'm talking to you!

Y, amended

Nope. Couldn't live with the cop-out. Here's a better pictograph for Y & Why:

Y & Why

One of the earliest HW posts was for the letter P. Since then, I've shied away from letters-as-homophones. For no good reason. Something about "illustrating" the letter feels like a cop-out to me, but I suppose it's perfectly valid and I should just get over it. 

So it's time to embrace the cop-out! Try this one on for size – the ultimate pictographic shortcut! 

And now that that's over, we can get on with the other letter homophones in dew thyme. 

Gilt & Guilt

Gilt – (adj.) covered with gold.
Guilt – (n.) having done something wrong, or a feeling of remorse.

Ball & Bawl

This must be the same crying kid from A parent & Apparent. Kid needs to shut up and ball, for real.

Vial & Vile

Vial – (n.) small bottle.
Vile – (adj.) repulsive, offensive.

There's also "viol," an antique family of stringed instruments. But I assume anyone writing about those knows how to spell it.

Knows & Nose

As in: "No one knows why Michael Jackson wanted his nose to look like that."

Ordinance & Ordnance

With the i – a rule or law.

Without the i – military weapons and ammunition.

Stationary & Stationery

-ary – unmoving, unchanging.

-ery – paper and other writing materials, often personalized. 

"The nice stationery I was supposed to use as thank-you cards when I graduated high school sat stationary in a drawer for many years."

I'm not alone in the universe!

http://learnyourdamnhomophones.com/

Role & Roll

What can I say? Indiana Jones is a great role in a great movie. I won't apologize for coming back to him again and again on this blog. :) 

Of course, if you prefer your rolls hot and buttery, we can do that too:

Mucous & Mucus

In honor of the last four weeks of sickness around our house.
Mucous – (adj.) describing the cells and tissues that produce mucus.
Mucus – (n.) the slime produced by mucous cells and tissues. Often ending up in a tissue, come to think of it.
This one shouldn't be too hard to remember because -ous is such an obvious adjective suffix, as in "viscous," "infectious,"or, well, "obvious." So even if we can't remember the correct spelling, hopefully we can remember the part of speech we're talking about, can't we?

Pair, Pare, Payer, Pear

Pair – two objects.
Pare – cut the peel off, or cut into small slices.
Payer – person who pays.
Pear – world's most overrated fruit.